a couple of words on positivity

A couple of words on “positivity”.

When I look back about 1o years ago and saw myself believing in power of positivity. I read these famous bestsellers books about attracting things and switching every mood to positive and I also remember resonating with this. But after sometime I started to notice how fake I am becoming, how all these masks of being positive are not working for me at all! Actually it became much worse then before my positive attitude came to my life. Moreover I saw myself to be drained of energy anytime I attempting to feel positive! I noticed how much energy was involved in keeping this “positivity”! And oh, what a relieve came when I actually went to Primal therapy with Puja Lepp, where I could express my real emotions and not to fake anything anymore! My emotions were no longer suppressed, but recognised and valued! The energy started flowing and I felt this was REAL! Not that plastic mask of positivity I wore.

I am experiencing all variety of “negative” emotions: sadness, anger, envy, lust, greed, etc.  My path is to face them. Sometimes first what I feel is subtle contraction of my body – it is protection against feeling (I understood it after sometime) – and I am letting my body to relax and to melt in this feeling. The feeling normally softens and disappears, but it often reappears and the process goes on… Now Im not treating it as work, rather life and opportunity to live in presence. For me to accept whatever comes is truly accept myself – in this I see truly loving myself. There is so much energy unravels when I simply let everything to be without wanting to change, to redo my feelings. That is real freedom for me! And my joy is also real, its spontaneous, coming from presence,  and not in an attempt to cover what is “undesirable”.  I let everything what comes, not thinking – feeling it! Love presence! Love myself in all expressions!

My path is to see and accept everything what comes, just like pure water reflects everything without changing it.

 

 

 

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